how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
