I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
