we're blogging at a bar
operation harelip BJ is a go
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize