i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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