do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
