he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize