Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
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