im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
