So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
