How'd it feel making her break her religion?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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