If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
