If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize