I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
