one two three fourrrrnication!
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Green mimosas i think yes
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
