yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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