Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
