You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize