I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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