There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
