Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I think people are normalizing furries
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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