East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
