hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
