Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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