dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
