Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
