I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
