I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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