HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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