Don't you send me to vm
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
