I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
