remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Randomize
