someone get that fucking seahorse.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
So vagazzling was a success
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
