Midget sex pt 2 tonight
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
