kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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