I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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