Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
