You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
