Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize