I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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