Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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