Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
