I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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