Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
