My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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