Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
