VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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