There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
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