I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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