Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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