What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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