biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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