I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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