Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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