never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
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