I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
